Week 6 Discussion Jokes

Jokes or funny stories.

Three men, an Italian, a French and a Spanish went for a job interview in England. Before the interview, they were told that they must compose a sentence in English with three main words: green, pink and yellow. The Italian was first:
“I wake up in the morning. I see the yellow sun. I see the green grass and I think to myself, I hope it will be a pink day.”

The Spanish was next:
“I wake up in the morning, I eat a yellow banana, a green pepper and in the evening I watch the pink panther on TV.”

Last was the French:
“I wake up in the morning, I hear the phone “green…green…”, I pink up the phone and I say “Yellow ?…”

This is the story of two boys bathing. The first says to the other:
- I have good news and bad news.
- Start with the right one, the other boy answers.
- The good news is that according to the thermometer, the water has just warmed by two degrees.
- And what is the bad news?
- It's not because of the sun ...

The Queen of England travels to London by carriage with an important African character.
It’s when the horse blow! The queen is confused
"It’s the first time, I’m confused. I assure you, excuse me ..."
the high African character responds to him
"But I thought it was the horse!"

Two old English people play golf.
On the next road comes a funeral procession.
The first Englishman stops playing, removes his cap, while the funeral procession passes.
"Ah!" Said the other, "What civism! I never imagined that a player like you would find himself on the way to a funeral!
- That's to say, we were married for 40 years. "

Madam is on her death bed.
Her husband colonel asks her the question that burns her tongue for thirty years:
- Have you cheated on me?
In a soft voice she answers:
- Yes. Yes my love. But only twice.
- Two times! No more! My God, and me who thought you spent your time in the bed of others. Forgive me these frightful thoughts. With whom ?
- With whom ? Once with your general ...
- Oh! The bastard.
- And once with your regiment ...

A young French student is sent by his parents to spend a month in an English family. Lord Cunningam, take him around the property.
"Is this a golf course you have there?" said the French. "Wonderful! You play often?"
"No, I tried once? I didn’t like it. Too tiring."
Then they see two superb horses in a pen.
"Ah?" said the French. "You are riding!"
"No? I tried once? I didn’t like it. Too tired..."
The tour continues, and they’re following a tennis court.
"And I guess…"
"No, no," said the Englishman. "I tried once?" but I didn’t like it. "Too tiring." At that point, a young man walks up to them.
"Ah, my young friend, this is my son, Wiliam Cunningam.
The Frenchman shakes his hand and then turns to the Lord:
- Single Son, I presume…

A group of handicapped travelers take the bus and sing:

"Driver, if you are a champion, press! Press! Driver, if you are a champion, press the mushroom!"
The driver, reluctant at first, decides to accelerate.

The handicapped begin to sing again. To calm them, he presses a good blow on the accelerator. The drama is coming, the bus falls into a ditch.

The handicapped, safely, see the state of the driver and start singing:

“He is one of us … He does not walk any more like the others”

What’s the different between a cat and a comma?

A cat has claws at the end of paws; A comma is a pause at the end of a clause.

"Brian, do you think I'm a bad mother?
- Well, my name is Paul"

"- He used to take his dog to school every day, but he finally had to stop.
- How come?
- The dog got graduated

How do you cut the ocean in half?

With a see-saw

What’s the difference between a taxi and PSG?
The taxi takes no more than four at once.

What does a Chinese listen to music with?
A nemP3

-I lost 3kilos

-Have you cleared your makeup